Thursday, May 9, 2013

The things people say

Between cell phones, facebook, my job and living around the general population I get the pleasure of observing, reading, and listening to all the interesting things people will say to each other. 

It's fascinating. 

From a rude text message to a shocking facebook status to a face to face conversation- I find myself intrigued with what people say and why they say it. 

For instance, yesterday I had an interaction with an older man in which he started telling me about a TV show and how "the blacks. . . sure are unruly people."

Then he went on to make the following statement:

"If Lincoln could see how things are today, he would never have freed those slaves."

At first I thought maybe it was some sort of crazy, NOT so funny joke. Then I realized he was DEAD SERIOUS. 

He went on to talk about how prisons contain 90% "black" individuals and some other (incorrect) statistics to prove his point. 

Unfortunately I was not in a position to freak out on this bigoted old man, as much as I wanted to. So I abruptly changed the subject and I think he got the point when my response to his horrific statements was "So, what are you doing today to enjoy the nice weather?"

He mumbled something about his plans for the day and thankfully that lasted until the encounter was over and he was on his way far away from me and my raging pregnancy hormones before I did or said something I would regret. 

I did find myself in quite a bit of shock at his statement- first off that he would say something so awful to a STRANGER in a public place and secondly- he seriously believes that SLAVERY should never have ended!!! What? how? People like this still exist?!!!!

Not only do they still exist, the same type of reasoning is used to defend many other beliefs that humanity should not be considered equal- for one reason or another. 

As crazy as we think that someone would think slavery is acceptable, we still find ourselves surrounded with reasons and excuses to exclude people from equality. 

But I have faith- if you are one of those people, 50 years from now you'll be telling a young person the same things you're saying today and it will be just as shocking and disgusting to 99% of humanity as this mans belief that "blacks should still be slaves". You'll be that bigoted old man- or woman- but the difference will be your cause will have lost support decades ago and no one will be listening anymore. 

Monday, May 6, 2013

Not so much fun. . .

I have really tried not to bitch, whine, and complain too much about the ailments of pregnancy. I know they are temporary and WELL worth the outcome of a healthy baby and the resulting love and joy. I also am just incredibly grateful that I can conceive and carry a child to begin with- it's often something to be taken for granted.

Having a good attitude has definitely helped me with all of my ailments, but that doesn't mean they don't exist.

And so I need to vent. Recently I've heard comments about how "Lucky" I am to sit around at home, taking my daughter to the pool, sitting in the sun, and not having to work full time. Honestly there's not much else I can do, here's why:

I realized the other day how much worse this pregnancy has been than my pregnancy with our daughter. Technically I FEEL better- mentally, spiritually- and that has made a huge difference. But physically? The pain I feel on a daily basis is much, much worse by comparison.

Once again I find myself anemic- I have low hemoglobin and low red blood cell count. This happens because the baby requires a lot of nourishment/support from my body which can leave my body depleted of certain resources. Basically this translates into fatigue- my blood cannot effectively get oxygen around my body and so my energy levels are extremely low. The cure? Iron supplements/food with high iron levels. And if only it were that easy.

Iron supplements cause nausea and extreme constipation. Iron rich food can be difficult to make into a meal, especially since it is useless if consumed with calcium. Apparently calcium makes it so your body doesn't absorb the iron- so it cannot be consumed within an hour of ingesting iron supplements/iron rich food. Trust me, it's not easy finding iron rich foods and preparing them with foods that contain little to no calcium, so mostly I'm stuck with the nasty supplements and their wonderful side-effects.

Extreme pelvic pain. . . in preparation for birth, the body releases hormones to help loosen and relax joints and bones so that the baby can more easily be delivered. It's really a good thing and since this is not my first pregnancy my body has already been "loosened up" quite a bit.

Unfortunately this translates into low back pain, hip pain, and general pelvic pain. This makes it difficult to walk, get dressed, stand up, sit down. . . basically it makes it difficult to move. Especially being on the more petite side, my small "loosened" pelvis cannot fully support my body the way it normally can. Add on some extra weight and concentrate that weight right above the front of my pelvis- you've got a recipe for some major pain.

The cure? Child birth. What I can do to help? the exercises my dr. provided and "staying off my feet". I've also been told this condition is much worse in subsequent pregnancies, which is why I did not experience this level of pain previously.

As much I wanted to believe that "sitting is worse than standing!" I can now testify to the fact that my pelvis literally SCREAMS at me when I stand for too long.

Yesterday I worked for a mere 6 hours and I WASN'T EVEN STANDING THE ENTIRE TIME. . . when I got home I could literally barely walk. To the point where my husband scolded me for working too hard and begged me not to continue pushing myself to work shifts beyond my comfort level.

This is frustrating for me as I enjoy my job and I enjoy working full time. I like to make as much money as I can and usually despise shifts of less than 8 hours. I happily stay late if it's busy and have no problem putting in a 9 or 10 hour day- those days are the most profitable for me as I usually make a lot of tip money and some overtime as well. It's not uncommon for me to have some overtime on almost every paycheck. I like this. I LIKE working hard. I LIKE being proud of myself for making as much money as I possibly can. This means I have the funds to do the things that I like and go places with my family.

But right now, I can't. And actually- it really sucks and isn't so "fun" and "lucky".

Pregnancy is different for every woman, not everyone suffers the same ailments or to the same degree. This does not mean one pregnant woman is more "wimpy" than another. For instance, I don't really have a huge problem with morning sickness- I feel very nauseated and have no appetite, but I am not constantly throwing up. It's not fun, but it's nothing I can't manage or endure.

Does this mean the women who are constantly throwing up and violently ill are just wimps? Or am I just tougher than they are- I can keep it down! I have a stomach of steel! What's THEIR problem?

No. Our bodies handle the hormones and physical changes of pregnancy differently. Some of us suffer more in various areas than others and to greater degrees. It's highly individual and it would do everyone a lot of good to realize this and perhaps mull it over in their brains a few times before opening their mouths.